Happy New Year!

As we ring in the New Year, I hope you will take a few minutes to think about whatever blessings you may have, especially the people God has placed in your life.  Take some time tomorrow to tell the people who mean so much to you that you love and appreciate them.  If there is someone you need to forgive, do it, and let them know that you forgive them.  Don't let another day, week, month, or year go by without taking this step.  This is the perfect time to let go of past hurts and forgive.
Time passes by so quickly.  The Bible says our lives are like a shadow (1 Chronicles 29:15) or as James 4:14 states, "What is your life?  For yo are a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes." Make every day count with the people who matter most, your family.  And live on the basis of grace, God's grace.  Jay Adams wrote a book entitled Christian Living in the Home.  In it he talks about the challenges of marriage and family, and how far it is from an ideal place where peace and harmony are always found.  Instead, he says that there is one thing you can say about the Christian home and it is this, "Sinners live there."
I wish you and the people who matter to you a blessed New Year based on the love and grace of God, who loves us with an everlasting love.
Blessings,
Dr. Paul

Affluenza: Are You Kidding Me?

Have you heard the latest insanity from our courts?  This example comes from the case of Ethan Couch, a 16 year old who killed four people and injured two others while driving drunk.  He had three times the legal limit of alcohol in his blood (of course, as a minor, any amount of alcohol is illegal.  He also had two other drugs in his system.  He was driving a pick up truck owned by his dad's company with stolen beer in it, and when his companions asked him to slow down, he sped up.  Certainly seems like some serious justice and punishment should be handed down, don't you think?  The prosecutor felt that 20 years in jail would be an appropriate sentence.  How about you?  Instead, Tarrant County Judge Jean Boyd sentenced him to no jail time, 10 years of probation and time in a longer term treatment facility.  The facility costs $450,000 per year, to be paid by the young man's wealthy parents.  It offers a number of amenities, including equine therapy and organic foods.  How does a judge come up with a sentence like this?
Well, this young man has parents with money, and they paid for a premier defense team. The team paid for a psychologist, Gary Miller, who testified that this poor kid suffered from "affluenza."  He said that his well to do parents gave their son whatever he wanted, including "freedoms no young person should have."  Are you kidding me?  Really, REALLY, affluenza!  Hey, at least this psychologist has guts.  But where is the head of this judge.  How could any judge look at the loved ones of those family members killed and hurt and say that justice is being served with a sentence like this?
Even if you buy this idea of affluenza being a reality, it doesn't hold any water in a criminal case like this.  First, just because his parents supposedly gave him no consequences for his bad behavior, there are plenty of other places, like school, where a child can learn there are consequences for bad behavior. Second, the judge is doing exactly what this psychologists is saying his parents did, give him no meaningful consequences for his now deadly behavior.
But we can all learn from this case in spite of the obvious insanity displayed by this judge.  Parents need to enforce consequences for the good and bad behavior of their children.  And the sooner the better.
Blessings,
Dr. Paul

The Family That Stays Together…..

The Family Research Council just published a new study on the impact of married couples who stay together compared to couples who divorce.  The study found that a married couple's decision to stay together is more influential in lowering the number of teenage out-of-wedlock births, unemployment in fathers, and the number of Americans on welfare than any other factor.  Researchers found that family cohesion is the main factor in determining whether a child will graduate from high school, families avoiding the need for welfare, and the rate of employment among young men.
This is interesting news in light of the popular notion that if a couple is having problems in their marriage, it is better for them to divorce than to expose the kids to ongoing conflict. In fact this study is just the latest addition to the wealth of research demonstrating that unless there is physical abuse, sexual abuse, or drug use, it is better for the couple to stay together, seek counseling, and not give up on the marriage.  Kids need a mom and a dad, and they need to see them work out their problems, even when there is serious disagreement and disfunction.  By every measure, kids always are better off when their parents stay together.  Don't believe it?  Ask some children and adults you know whose parents split up.
Blessings,
Dr. Paul